Category Archives: Humour

And God said, “Let there be Limericks” (Genesis as a Limerick)

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I’m teaching an undergraduate course on the book of Genesis this semester. One of the first assignments I require students to complete is to read through the book of Genesis (preferably in one sitting) and write one or two brief yet descriptive sentences for each chapter of the book. I have a number of different reasons behind getting students to do this assignment, perhaps my biggest reason is to get students into the biblical text right at the beginning of the semester. This exercise also provides students with an outline of the book which they can use as a study aid throughout the semester.

While I always encourage creativity, most of the assignments are well done, but pretty straightforward. That being said, a number of years ago when I was teaching a course at Wycliffe College in Toronto, one of my students, Joseph Walker, went far beyond any expectations and wrote his chapter summaries as an extended limerick. Joseph is now the rector at St Timothy’s Anglican Church here in Edmonton (he kindly gave me permission to share the limrick with you). Enjoy.

1 The God who created the world,
2 on this planet humanity hurled,
3 with a snake in the grass,
4 to tempt family en masse,
5 Adam’s generations unfurled.

6 They were wicked (no need to convince!),
7 God said “Get in the ark, I’ll evince
8 with a great Holy Wash,
9 my covenant, gosh
10 and three sons will come out in the rinse.

11 They could not reach heaven by skill
12 so God thought “Someday I’ll fulfill
13 a promise of lands
14 where Melchizedek stands
15 if Abe keeps my covenant still.�

16 So Ishmael resulted from quibbling
17 but the promise of “heir� kept on nibbling.
18 After Sodom’s destruction,
19 and old Lot’s instruction,
20 tell us, is she or ain’t she your sibling?

21 Finally Sarah and Abe had a son,
22 (by sacrifice almost undone!)
23 and then Sarah died
24 and young Isaac applied
25 to the birthing of two, not just one!

26 Now Isaac, his father did imitate,
27 and a strange way of blessing initiate,
28 on Jake’s dreamy head,
29 who then thought instead,
30 of marriage (and family) to consummate.

31 At Laban’s striped flock he did point,
32 his new name put him all out of joint,
33 his bro’ burst his bubble,
34 his kids got in trouble,
35 and all their 12 names we have loint.*

36 Esau’s descendants were listed by name,
37 Joe’s brothers did wrong, to their shame,
38 what with Judah’s romances,
39 and Pot’s wife’s advances,
40 some hard luck to Joseph soon came.

41 Yet Joseph was favored with power,
42 and his brothers before him did cower,
43 though he tricked like a thief,
44 to his brothers’ relief,
45 his father with presents he’d shower.

46 So Israel left his vicinity,
47 in Egypt they were blessed by Divinity
48 and the Patriarchs passed
49 on their blessings, at last
50 and the Covenant went on to infinity

*With apologies to the Brooklyn / east side N.Y. accent

If you liked this sample of his writing, you should check out Joseph’s blog, Felix Hominum.


My Messy Desk

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I have inherited my father’s messy desk. When I was in my teens, I actually bought my father a little plaque that read, “A Clean Desk is the Sign of a Sick Mind.” (When my father died, I looked everywhere for the plaque, since I figured that I could use it for my own desk! For those wanting to see a picture of my desk, see my previous post on this subject here)

The New York Times has an article that highlights the benefits of mess. The article, “Saying Yes to Mess,” is written in response to the “National Association of Professional Organizers” (!) dubbing January “Get Organized Month.” Here’s an excerpt:

An anti-anticlutter movement is afoot, one that says yes to mess and urges you to embrace your disorder. Studies are piling up that show that messy desks are the vivid signatures of people with creative, limber minds (who reap higher salaries than those with neat “office landscapes�) and that messy closet owners are probably better parents and nicer and cooler than their tidier counterparts. It’s a movement that confirms what you have known, deep down, all along: really neat people are not avatars of the good life; they are humorless and inflexible prigs, and have way too much time on their hands.

This is exactly what I have always believed! Sweet… now I don’t have to bother clearing off my desk!

(HT Ian’s Messy Desk)


Memorable TV Catchphrases

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The TV Land cable network has put together a list of the 100 greatest catchphrases in television. There will be a countdown special, “The 100 Greatest TV Quotes & Catch Phrases,” over five days starting December 11.

You can see the whole list here. Here are some of my favourites:

  • “I know nothing!” (Sgt. Schultz, “Hogan’s Heroes”)
  • “Jane, you ignorant sl*t” (Dan Aykroyd to Jane Curtin, “Saturday Night Live”)
  • “No soup for you!” (The Soup Nazi, “Seinfeld”)
  • “Resistance is futile” (Picard as Borg, “Star Trek: The Next Generation”)
  • “Silly rabbit, Trix are for kids” (Trix cereal ad) (For some reason I actually said this to my kids the other day and they thought I was nuts)
  • “Space, the final frontier . . .” (Capt. Kirk, “Star Trek”)
  • “We are two wild and crazy guys!” (Steve Martin and Dan Aykroyd as Czech playboys, “Saturday Night Live”)
  • “You look mahvelous!” (Billy Crystal as Fernando, “Saturday Night Live”)

One phrase that really ought to be on the list is, IMHO, “Eat my shorts” (Bart Simpson).

(HT Bits & Pieces)


More on Potties: Qumran, World Toilet Expo, and Princess Diana

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I bet you’re wondering what could Qumran, Expos, and Princess Diana possibly have in common?! Well, a Google search on the “Dead Sea Scrolls” brings up the following:

  • More information available on the latrines found at Khirbet Qumran is provided by James Tabor at his Jesus Dynasty blog — including a number of pictures that show the latrine’s location.
  • Reuters has a new piece on the The World Toilet Expo and Forum just got underway in Bangkok. — gee, and I have to go to Washington for the SBL. Bummer! (haha! so punny)
  • The Spoof.com has a — you guessed it — spoof on the whole Qumran latrine business the connects it with Princess Diana: “Diana Fountain ‘modelled on Dead Sea Scrolls latrine’” — is nothing sacred?! (I mean poking fun at Qumran, not Diana).